Saturday, June 26, 2010
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
(There is only a hospital bed on stage which is not lit at this point. Spotlight only on Lara who is standing CS, looking around the room she begins. Talking to audience.)
Lara: Brevity is the soul of wit. Profound huh? Yeah, too bad I didn’t think of it. Well, although I’m not very witty, I will try to be brief. Vivian Bearing died of Stage four ovarian cancer. Vivian and I are alike in a lot of ways. We like literature, we are both teachers, we are both characters in a play and I, like Vivian am in stage four, not of ovarian cancer but of something else altogether. However, unlike Vivian, I will not die.
So, ok, here we go: Stage 1, Chronic. Chronic means it is ALWAYS there and it’s ALWAYS going to be there. Stage 2: Auto-immune, auto-immune means my immune system is raping me, simple enough right? Stage 3: Fatigue, fatigue is what happens next.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
I was able to take a sigh of relief for once and leave the doc's office feeling positive and hopeful as opposed to morbidly confused and upset.
On the downside, there is the fact that I have to increase one of my meds (the Cellcept) if I ever hope to decrease another (the prednisone). Reason it's a downside?
Cellcept: an oral medication given usually to patients who have recieved an organ transplant. Cellcept side effects- diarreah, constipation, anxiety, sleeplessness, fatigue, dizziness and it has strong label to: A)avoid prolonged exposure to the sun because likelihood of skin cancer increases greatly while on this medication and B)use two types of contraceptives while on this medication because "YOU DO NOT WANT TO BECOME PREGNANT WHILE ON THIS DRUG."
BUT being on prednisone (a corticosteriod) is absolutely no fun either. 1. I've gained 10lbs while on it, 2. increased risk of developing cataracts and diabetes later on, 3. weaning off it is a PAIN (depression, suicidal thoughts etc.)
SO, I'm desperate to get off the pred, but kinda bummed that by increasing the Cellcept I'll have to wait even longer to have a beautiful brown Domexican. Oh well, se la vi, I suppose. I'll just have to be patient and enjoy the health and peace of my mind and spirit that God has been so gracious to give me these last few weeks and look forward to an even better year.
I told Lupe the other day, that I think we are finally heading into a time of happiness and well deserved peace. Spending time with friends and family over the last few days has made us feel good and has brought us closer together, so as we move ahead into our second year of marriage, I want to thank God for the trials and tribulations he set forth during our first year so we could really appreciate the good times that lie ahead. I am thankful for my friends and our parents that stood by us ready to lend a helping hand during everything that could and did go wrong. (Death, sickness, surgeries, funerals, cars, homes, work everything)
We leave that all behind now, closing doors and opening big, bright windows which will finally let the sunshine in.
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I am where I was intended to be."